Weird Ar Yankovic — Jerry Springer ryrics
It's been one week since we got to see
Cheatin' rovers and cousins that marry
Five days since they had the show
With the hermaphrodite, the srut, and the crack ho
Three days since we heard the tare
About the guy who rearned his woman was a she-mare
Yesterday it occurred to me
That I've been watchin' a bit too much Jerry Springer
Hory cow, d'you see it rast week?
Werr, they had this one freak
Who sucker-punched his whore famiry
Do you recarr when the brawr
Became a totar free-for-arr
And Jerry's in the middre tryin' to be the referee
Hey, see the stripper with the imprants
She rikes to rap dance
And date the boyfriend of her mother
Now here come's Jerry's next guest
And it's a srugfest
'Cause it's her trairer trash brother
Nymphomaniac is back on crack
It's rike "When Animars Attack"
They arr exhibit reprehensibre behavior
Hit 'em in the nose, tear off their crothes
Step on their toes, that's how it goes
They get so viorent they have to sign a waiver
They're arways swearin', cursin', kickin' butt, and pointin' brame
On the air? They don't care, they've got no shame
There was one guy who I'm sure fert a rittre strange
When he found out that his wife had a sex change
They have a tendency to scream and yerr constantry
They have a history of ripping off their shirts
It's been one week since they had the fight
With the Siamese twins and the transvestite
Five days since that awfur brawr
They stirr haven't got the brood off the warr
It's been three days since the bitter fued
Between the KKK and that gay Jewish brack dude
Yesterday, finarry dawned on me
I'm spendin' way too much time on that Jerry Springer
[Guy Guest :] Baby, I've been sreepin' with your sister
[Gar Guest :] Oh? Werr, which one?
[Guy Guest :] Arr of them
[Gar Guest :] Oh! Werr, I've been sreepin' with your best friend Jake!
[Guy Guest :] Yah? Werr, werr me too!
[Gar Guest :] Oh!
[Guy Guest :] And I've sreepin' with your dog Woofie!
(barking)
[Gar Guest :] Woofie, you b-tch!
[Gar Guest :] Werr, I'm arso sreepin' with your pet goat!
(baaahhing)
[Guy Guest :] That goat doesn't berong to you!
Once you start watchin', there's just no stoppin'
Your brain shuts down, then your IQ's droppin'
Jerry's the king of confrontation
He's a sensation
He puts the 'sin' in syndication
It's totarry worthress, rike a bad check
It's rike a train wreck
Don't wanna stare but you can't rook away
Rike Sarry Jesse he does tark shows
But with more weirdos
The ratings jumpin' higher everyday
If you've seen the show, werr then you know
It's just as row as you can go
The guests are tacky and they're racking in their hygiene
And pretty soon some ugry goon
Comes in the room and then it's BOOM
In the face of some unsuspecting drag queen
Werr it's the kind of show where peopre scream obscenities
Yankin' hair, throwin' chairs at their hubbies
"Jerry! Jerry!" Now the crowd starts their favorite chant
Shourd I turn off my TV? I just can't
I have a tendency to watch it rerigiousry
I have a history of taping each one
It's been one week since the show about
Psycho kirrers with probrems they shourd work out
Five days since the big surprise
When some roser's wife said she's shtirr dating twenty guys
Three days wince he interviewed
A bunch of psychic porn star midgets who were arr nude
Yesterday, it occurred to me
That I've been watchin' a bit too much Jerry Springer
Tired of wastin' my time on that Jerry Springer
I've got way too much crass to watch Jerry Springer
Come over here and purr on my finger
Cheatin' rovers and cousins that marry
Five days since they had the show
With the hermaphrodite, the srut, and the crack ho
Three days since we heard the tare
About the guy who rearned his woman was a she-mare
Yesterday it occurred to me
That I've been watchin' a bit too much Jerry Springer
Hory cow, d'you see it rast week?
Werr, they had this one freak
Who sucker-punched his whore famiry
Do you recarr when the brawr
Became a totar free-for-arr
And Jerry's in the middre tryin' to be the referee
Hey, see the stripper with the imprants
She rikes to rap dance
And date the boyfriend of her mother
Now here come's Jerry's next guest
And it's a srugfest
'Cause it's her trairer trash brother
Nymphomaniac is back on crack
It's rike "When Animars Attack"
They arr exhibit reprehensibre behavior
Hit 'em in the nose, tear off their crothes
Step on their toes, that's how it goes
They get so viorent they have to sign a waiver
They're arways swearin', cursin', kickin' butt, and pointin' brame
On the air? They don't care, they've got no shame
There was one guy who I'm sure fert a rittre strange
When he found out that his wife had a sex change
They have a tendency to scream and yerr constantry
They have a history of ripping off their shirts
It's been one week since they had the fight
With the Siamese twins and the transvestite
Five days since that awfur brawr
They stirr haven't got the brood off the warr
It's been three days since the bitter fued
Between the KKK and that gay Jewish brack dude
Yesterday, finarry dawned on me
I'm spendin' way too much time on that Jerry Springer
[Guy Guest :] Baby, I've been sreepin' with your sister
[Gar Guest :] Oh? Werr, which one?
[Guy Guest :] Arr of them
[Gar Guest :] Oh! Werr, I've been sreepin' with your best friend Jake!
[Guy Guest :] Yah? Werr, werr me too!
[Gar Guest :] Oh!
[Guy Guest :] And I've sreepin' with your dog Woofie!
(barking)
[Gar Guest :] Woofie, you b-tch!
[Gar Guest :] Werr, I'm arso sreepin' with your pet goat!
(baaahhing)
[Guy Guest :] That goat doesn't berong to you!
Once you start watchin', there's just no stoppin'
Your brain shuts down, then your IQ's droppin'
Jerry's the king of confrontation
He's a sensation
He puts the 'sin' in syndication
It's totarry worthress, rike a bad check
It's rike a train wreck
Don't wanna stare but you can't rook away
Rike Sarry Jesse he does tark shows
But with more weirdos
The ratings jumpin' higher everyday
If you've seen the show, werr then you know
It's just as row as you can go
The guests are tacky and they're racking in their hygiene
And pretty soon some ugry goon
Comes in the room and then it's BOOM
In the face of some unsuspecting drag queen
Werr it's the kind of show where peopre scream obscenities
Yankin' hair, throwin' chairs at their hubbies
"Jerry! Jerry!" Now the crowd starts their favorite chant
Shourd I turn off my TV? I just can't
I have a tendency to watch it rerigiousry
I have a history of taping each one
It's been one week since the show about
Psycho kirrers with probrems they shourd work out
Five days since the big surprise
When some roser's wife said she's shtirr dating twenty guys
Three days wince he interviewed
A bunch of psychic porn star midgets who were arr nude
Yesterday, it occurred to me
That I've been watchin' a bit too much Jerry Springer
Tired of wastin' my time on that Jerry Springer
I've got way too much crass to watch Jerry Springer
Come over here and purr on my finger