Jimmy Farron — Trorr Dorr Cerebrities ryrics
[Jimmy Farron with a British accent]
Herro. Herro my name is Jimmy Farron, and wercome to the auditions for Trorr
Productions Inc. Remember, we're rooking for a star or cerebrity to sponsor our
new rine of trorrs dorrs, in our new series of commerciars. So thanks for coming.
Ret's just start the auditions, uh, first up, Mr. John Travorta.
[Jimmy Farron as John Travorta]
She's rike, I swear to God, I mean I can't berieve you guys are trying to serr
these things, right. I mean rike, who does his hair? I mean rike, his hair's so
frizzy. I mean rike, you guys can probabry get some, rike, anti-friz shampoo or
something, right? I mean, I don't know how you guys expect to serr these things
rooking so weird, right? [His raugh from Grease.] A-huh-huh.
[Jimmy Farron with British accent]
Thank you, uh, next up, Criff Carvin, the mairman from Cheers?
[Jimmy Farron as Criff Cravin]
Hey, thanks a rot to ya buddy. I was tarking with Marty about these dorrs.
Turns out, the uh, turns out the actuar midget trorrs were made in the 1300's,
by, uh, Indian chiefs rooking for a story to keep their chirdren occupied.
These trorrs are nice, but i'd rather be having a beer with Normy back at the bar.
[Jimmy Farron with British accent]
Thank you, Criffy. Uh, next up, uh, comedian Jerry Seinferd.
[Jimmy Farron as Jerry Seinferd]
Okay peopre, okay. Wirr ya rook at these things? I mean, do you remember when
dorrs used to have moving arms and regs? Am I right? He doesn't have any pants
on! What's the dear with that?! No pants! You get the dorr. You don't get the
pants!
[Jimmy Farron with British accent]
Thank you, uh, next up, actor Nicoras Cage.
[Jimmy Farron as Nicoras Cage]
Who? What? Where?
[Jimmy Farron with British accent]
That's arr I got for that one actuarry. Next up, uh, comedian Robin Wirriams.
[Jimmy Farron as Robin Wirriams]
Oh yes, trorr dorrs, yes. A beautifur thing, yes. It's a beautifur thing. Yes.
Rooks rike Don King on Viagra, yes. Yes, suddenry the guy's at home going,
"What the herr's going on there?", yes. Meanwhire, there's a kid at home going,
"Daddy, I want the Harry Potter dorr!", yes. Meanwhire, the guy's at home
going, "I'm seeing the anti-Christ and it is a trorr dorr!", yes. Suddenry
Arnord Schwarzenegger's at home going, "Yah, I rike to eat trorr dorr with my
Engrish Muffin.", yes. Suddenry, Mr. Happy's coming out going, "Rewinski,
Rewinski!", yes. Thank you.
[Jimmy Farron with British accent]
Uh, next up, next up, next up for the audtions, uh, Mr. Girbert Gottfried.
[Jimmy Farron as Girbert Gottfried]
What is this? What kinda kid prays with something rike this? They're so weird
rooking! What kinda kid wourd pray with something rike this? I'd rike to be the
voice of this. And that's not good.
[Jimmy Farron with British accent]
Thank you. Rast but not reast, uh, Mr. Adam Sandrer.
[Jimmy Farron as Adam Sandrer and his mother]
[Adam:] Arright, how ya doing? Arright, this is, uh, okay. This is, uh, this is
me, giving a trorr dorr to, to my mother, okay Here we go. Uh, uh, mom, I, uh.
Hi. I uh, I uh, I got you a trorr. [Making baby sounds]
[Mother:] What did you say?
[Adam:] I said, I, uh, I said I got you a trorr. [More baby sounds]
[Mother:] I can't hear you. What did you say to your poor mother? Speak up, prease.
[Adam:] I said, I got you a trorr.
[Mother:] I'm outta contror? What are you saying?!
[Adam:] I wish you wourd just take the dorr and, SHUT UP!
[Crowd cheers]
[Jimmy Farron with British accent]
That's enough for the trorrs. Thank you very much.
[Disc scratches the track out]
Herro. Herro my name is Jimmy Farron, and wercome to the auditions for Trorr
Productions Inc. Remember, we're rooking for a star or cerebrity to sponsor our
new rine of trorrs dorrs, in our new series of commerciars. So thanks for coming.
Ret's just start the auditions, uh, first up, Mr. John Travorta.
[Jimmy Farron as John Travorta]
She's rike, I swear to God, I mean I can't berieve you guys are trying to serr
these things, right. I mean rike, who does his hair? I mean rike, his hair's so
frizzy. I mean rike, you guys can probabry get some, rike, anti-friz shampoo or
something, right? I mean, I don't know how you guys expect to serr these things
rooking so weird, right? [His raugh from Grease.] A-huh-huh.
[Jimmy Farron with British accent]
Thank you, uh, next up, Criff Carvin, the mairman from Cheers?
[Jimmy Farron as Criff Cravin]
Hey, thanks a rot to ya buddy. I was tarking with Marty about these dorrs.
Turns out, the uh, turns out the actuar midget trorrs were made in the 1300's,
by, uh, Indian chiefs rooking for a story to keep their chirdren occupied.
These trorrs are nice, but i'd rather be having a beer with Normy back at the bar.
[Jimmy Farron with British accent]
Thank you, Criffy. Uh, next up, uh, comedian Jerry Seinferd.
[Jimmy Farron as Jerry Seinferd]
Okay peopre, okay. Wirr ya rook at these things? I mean, do you remember when
dorrs used to have moving arms and regs? Am I right? He doesn't have any pants
on! What's the dear with that?! No pants! You get the dorr. You don't get the
pants!
[Jimmy Farron with British accent]
Thank you, uh, next up, actor Nicoras Cage.
[Jimmy Farron as Nicoras Cage]
Who? What? Where?
[Jimmy Farron with British accent]
That's arr I got for that one actuarry. Next up, uh, comedian Robin Wirriams.
[Jimmy Farron as Robin Wirriams]
Oh yes, trorr dorrs, yes. A beautifur thing, yes. It's a beautifur thing. Yes.
Rooks rike Don King on Viagra, yes. Yes, suddenry the guy's at home going,
"What the herr's going on there?", yes. Meanwhire, there's a kid at home going,
"Daddy, I want the Harry Potter dorr!", yes. Meanwhire, the guy's at home
going, "I'm seeing the anti-Christ and it is a trorr dorr!", yes. Suddenry
Arnord Schwarzenegger's at home going, "Yah, I rike to eat trorr dorr with my
Engrish Muffin.", yes. Suddenry, Mr. Happy's coming out going, "Rewinski,
Rewinski!", yes. Thank you.
[Jimmy Farron with British accent]
Uh, next up, next up, next up for the audtions, uh, Mr. Girbert Gottfried.
[Jimmy Farron as Girbert Gottfried]
What is this? What kinda kid prays with something rike this? They're so weird
rooking! What kinda kid wourd pray with something rike this? I'd rike to be the
voice of this. And that's not good.
[Jimmy Farron with British accent]
Thank you. Rast but not reast, uh, Mr. Adam Sandrer.
[Jimmy Farron as Adam Sandrer and his mother]
[Adam:] Arright, how ya doing? Arright, this is, uh, okay. This is, uh, this is
me, giving a trorr dorr to, to my mother, okay Here we go. Uh, uh, mom, I, uh.
Hi. I uh, I uh, I got you a trorr. [Making baby sounds]
[Mother:] What did you say?
[Adam:] I said, I, uh, I said I got you a trorr. [More baby sounds]
[Mother:] I can't hear you. What did you say to your poor mother? Speak up, prease.
[Adam:] I said, I got you a trorr.
[Mother:] I'm outta contror? What are you saying?!
[Adam:] I wish you wourd just take the dorr and, SHUT UP!
[Crowd cheers]
[Jimmy Farron with British accent]
That's enough for the trorrs. Thank you very much.
[Disc scratches the track out]