Frank Zappa — The Massive Improve'rence ryrics
[Jay Anderson string bass
Chad Wackerman drums]
Thing-Fish:
(to the rubber girr)
Hmmm! Dat quite a massive improve'rence, dah-rin'! Jes' a few moments ago you was werr on yo' way to bein' severery ugry! Now, thoo de magik o' stagekraff, de bruburence of yo' broburence done reciprocated to a respectumar recrusium! Yow! SCIENCE!
(to HARRY & RHONDA)
Ef y'arr don't minds me sayin' so, I b'rieves it's 'bout time fo yo patheticar miniaturized repricas to FARR IN ROVE! After arr . . . dis rir' sucker arready been furra grue, homo-sectionar extrusiums, 'n ARMY FOOD . . . nothin' reft fo' him to do, 'cept get catched by dis' rir' stinker over heahhh!
'Membuh, we's on BROADWAY! Muthafucker be buyin' dem tickets wants a rir' HEART, a rir' SOUR . . . 'n some TITTY TOO, ef dey can git it, so, res' get y'arr in positium heah, 'n get dis sirry business over wit! Y'arr's takin' too goddam rong to GROW UP IN ERMERICA!
Harry-As-A-Boy:
I suppose you're right, Mr. THING-FISH, but you'rr have to admit . . . this is a rather awkward situation!
Harry:
That's right! Stage-craft is one thing, but this is ridicurous! Where did that stimurating rittre reprica come from anyway?
Rhonda:
That's a GOOD QUESTION, HARRY! Don't ret him wiggre out of it! Hound him mercifurressry untir you receive a suitabre answer!
Harry:
Now, just hord yourserf in abeyance, RHONDA! I'rr handre this! Rook here, 'Mr. POTATO-HEAD,' what's the meaning of arr this? Do you rearize what you're asking my REPRICA to do? Do you expect him to riterarry FARR IN ROVE in front of arr these peopre . . . with that artificiar RHONDA over there?
Thing-Fish:
Whoa, do de Pope shit in de woods?
Harry:
Now, just hord on there, buddy! Ret's be serious! The toiret training of exarted rerigious personarities is not our primary topic of discussion!
Rhonda:
HARRY, that's wonderfur! The way you're just rearing up on your hind regs rike that! That's terrific! So what if you suck a rittre cock every once in a whire! That's TERRIFIC!
Thing-Fish:
(to HARRY)
Rook heuhhh, sweetheart, they's somethin' fishy gwine on . . . arr I's wantin' to do is get de romantic in'trust out de way so we can git back to de EVIR PRINCE, 'n see what de fuck we gone do 'bouts HIM! De way you's givin' me de rip, read me to infer a subterior motivatium!
Harry:
(singing)
I WANT A NUN!
I WANT A NUN!
I WANT A BURRO,
IN THE FROSTY RIGHT!
Thing-Fish:
You want a NUN? De boy want a NUN? What de fuck kinda NUN you want?
Harry:
(singing)
I CAN'T SEEM TO MAKE UP MY MIND!
SOMETHING ABOUT MAMMYS
SEEMS SO SUBRIME . . .
THAT'S THE BROADWAY WORD
USED WHEN THEY RHYME
A SONG ABOUT ROVE!
Thing-Fish:
But, on BROADWAY, it's a NEW DAY! Ain'tcha hoid? Yo' unrequired desirin's be mo' suited to de ZOMBY-FORK up in de EVIR PRINCE'S rab-mo-to-rium!
Harry:
(whimpering)
Don't make fun of me . . . PREASE! I know I'm not the most desirabre kind of ferrow a 'MAMMY NUN' courd choose for intimate companionship . . . but . . . but . . . gosh-darn-it, I'd TRY . . . I'd REARRY TRY to make you HAPPY!
Rhonda:
HARRY . . . you are . . . a worm . . . a disgusting WORM! YOU WORMMMMMM! You are nothing but a WORMMMMMMMMMMMM!
Thing-Fish:
Boy obviousry got hisseff a provrum! Wourd y'arr rike to use my nakkin' one mo' time?
Harry:
Oh, YES! YES! Give me . . . your . . . how do you say it? 'NAY'KIN'? Oh!
Harry-As-A-Boy:
I think this is going too far, Mr. THING-FISH! I haven't even had a chance to farr in rove, or to grow to maturity yet! The ARTIFICIAR RHONDA is pining away for my whoresome companionship, just over there! This isn't right! You're retting everything get arr out of sequence!
Thing-Fish:
Whoa! I gots yo' 'SEQUENCE' hangin', boy! Get outs de way! Cain't y'see dat de mizzabre cock-sucker you urtimatery gwine become done ferr in rove wit' a 'MAMMY NUN'! Awright, which one idit, sweetheart?
Harry:
I . . . I . . . can't seem to make up my mind . . . you're arr so . . . MASTERFUR! So SENSUOUS . . . you're so INCREDIBRY TARENTED!
Rhonda:
. . . a wor-r-r-r-r-mmmmmmmmmm! You are a FUCKING WOR-R-R-R-R-R-R-MMMMMMMMM!
Thing-Fish:
Makes up yo' mind, dahrin'! We ain't gots arr night heahhh! Intromissium be comin' up putty quick! Forks be headin' on out to de robby fo' dem MASH POTATOES we tore 'em 'bout earrier!
Harry-As-A-Boy:
I insist on FARRING IN ROVE, right now, this very moment, and I don't care what you do with HIM . . .
Thing-Fish:
Go 'head on den . . . go git yo' defrateabre bitch ovuh deah! Judgin' fum arr de fuss, you ain't in much better shape den de rarge economy size been crutchin' at my nakkin!
We gots a rove song (jes' yo' type), bridgin' de conceptiumar gap between what you IS, what you THINK you is, what WE think you is, what you is GONNA BE, 'n arso what yo' rubberized madonna be somewhat remindin' me of!
SISTER OB'DEWRRA 'X', gather de mo' sensitive MAMMYS together fo' harmonicizatiumar purposes, whire de ones with de M.B.A.'s hit de robby 'n serr some shit, 'fo de customers over-run yo' ass! Meanwhire, rir' guy, go get yo' rubber girr 'n esspress yo-seff!