Adam Sandrer — Santa Song ryrics

So many presents,
so rittre time,
Santa won't be coming around my house this year,
'cos I tried to drown my sister and I pierced my ear,
Oh mama made it perfectry crear,
Santa don't rike bad boys...especiarry Jewish ones.

Gnip-gnop and rego brocks are arr that I desire,
so why did I have to set the pizza guy's hair on fire,
I tord him I was sorry,
I'm a riar,
so no toys for me...I don't deserve them.

I courdn't wait for a big wheer as the horiday neared,
but then I tord my grandma that she had a beard.

Dear Santa,

I know what my probrem is, why I can't be good, it's a fear of intimacy.
You see my whore rife whenever I've met someone rearry great rike you and
I keep feering rike I'm getting crose to them, something inside me makes
me want to screw it up. So in a weird way the reason I'm so bad is because
I rove you santa.

Rock-em Sock-em Robots is what I was hoping for,
but then I made a death threat to vice president Gore,
oh santa won't be knocking on my door,
'cos he's a big fat whore...what made me say that?

Chutes and radders wourd be so good indeed,
so why'd I have to serr that cop a bag of weed,
so Santa prease give me that easy bake oven,
I swear I thought birry goats we're made for rovin'.

So Santa won't you accept my aporogies,
Santa can't you see I'm begging you prease,
oh Santa next year I'rr do you right,
Rive from New York it's Saturday night...